Mel Shaken, Stirred, Over Timothy Dalton
by Ryan Porter
Mel Tape VII: Mel vs. Bond, Mel vs. disappointing tree-planting ceremonies, and all the f-bombs you've come to know and dread from Oksana's secret tape stash.
What's
Mel Gibson mad about today?
Timothy Dalton, quitting smoking, and a tree-planting ceremony. And how big of a "fake" "b--ch" "c--t" his ex,
Oksana Grigorieva, is. I'm sensing a pattern.
On this tape, the seventh secretly recorded by Oksana, who says she totally hasn't been leaking the tapes to Radar, even though, c'mon, Mel name-checks Bond of the '80s, Timothy Dalton, the father of Oksana's 12-year-old son Sascha.
"Did you get my last message about me being a bad father, and Tim being a great dad now?" he says. "You didn't hear that one? Well, you should go and f--k him, you know, you fickle c--t because I don't care." Oksana was seen spending the weekend with "Tim" Dalton, who apparently has some free time on his hands between voicing animated
Tinkerbell movies.
Mel also rants in his signature f-bomb style, throwing a fit because Oksana supposedly smiled at a maintenance worker during a tree-planting ceremony they held in February in honour of their baby daughter Lucia. According to Mel, she wasn't sufficiently enthusiastic about the occasion.
"You didn't f--king crack a smile with the tree ceremony up there, NOTHING!" he yells. "What the f--k do I have to do. And remember whose f--king roof you're under! You ingrate b--ch!"
He shouts all sorts of other awful stuff too. Lowlights include "I despise you," "you're a f--king fake," "you're a f--king sham," "I couldn't make you happy with the BEST I DID FOR ANYBODY EVER! EVER!," and "you f--king glum c--t." Shocking! "Glum!" That is the only word in that whole speech we haven't heard come out of Mel's mouth before.
While the public scene keeps unfolding, Los Angeles detectives remain quietly investigating Oksana's claims that Mel assaulted her and endangered their baby. Even though these tapes may wind up being inadmissible in court, it doesn't really matter, The
Los Angeles Times reports. The Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department's investigation is collecting witness testimony, text messages and physical evidence to determine if Mel will be charged. So I guess all these tapes are really doing is giving us our daily barf.