Dear Nicky,


It's rather interesting that you should use the word risk in your question because yes, there are many risks involved when marrying someone you you've just met.  And I get the sense that perhaps you already realize this.  Without question we tread dangerous territory when we jump headfirst into a serious relationship.  Often times we are overcome with emotion and it blocks our ability to make rational decisions when it comes to matters of the heart. Sometimes you may think you know a person but chances are you don't know them thoroughly enough to make a life-long commitment. Some couples are overcome with feelings of infatuation and they mistake that for true love, so taking time to get to know the ins and outs of your partner is extremely important.  When the honeymoon period is over and the love blinders are off, the relationship may fizzle out.  Unless there is a specific reason to run to the altar, then ask yourself, what is the rush? Once you're married and reality sets in, you may not feel the same towards your lover.  If you want to take a big step, move in together.  If you’ve already done this, try getting a pet.  If everything is going seamlessly after you have a routine and comfortable home life, then think about taking the plunge – and maybe try a reasonable engagement length.  Don’t ever look to celebrities for guidance because as we all know, marriage in Hollywood has a shorter shelf life than canned food. 

Prenuptial agreements are always a touchy subject. No one likes to think about their marriage going awry and what that would mean - especially while you're in the midst of the most exciting time of your romantic life. Many believe that pre-nups are only useful to people with a certain income and that just isn't the case anymore. If you have anything worth holding onto, then sign a pre-nup.  If you have any assets prior to marriage then simply put, you need to protect those assets. And as the divorce rate steadily rises, so too does our awareness that love doesn't always last forever.  There are circumstances in which you may personally bring in more money after marriage and rest assured there is a way to protect that as well.  If your fiancé is irked by the sound of a prenuptial agreement, explain that it can be done quickly and it’s something you both will never have to think about again.  If the marriage dissolves, the paper work is clear and you both can walk away having endured less stress.   Failed marriages are difficult enough to cope with, why torture yourselves with more lawyers and ugly disputes?

When you walk into a marriage without a pre-nup you definitely jeopardize your future.  When couples break up, there is no telling how both parties are going to react.  Even in an amicable divorce, there is a great chance one person involved will become bitter and attempt to hurt their former flame.  So, in short, protect your heart and your assets.